Second Chances

Whoever said you never get a second chance, not only forgot to consult with the guy who said if at first you don’t succeed, he forgot to check with me. Not having any experience as a husband when I married the first time at the age of twenty-one, I turned out to be pretty lousy at it. However, I did manage to have a beautiful daughter before the marriage completely fell apart.

Heather graduating from Touro Law School
at the Lincoln Center in NYC, May, 2010.

Now, I could have thanked my lucky stars to have had a chance and left well enough alone. According to a friend, Samuel Johnson declared that remarriage was the triumph of hope over experience. In that case, it was only fitting that Elizabeth Taylor had a diamond larger than the hope diamond, since she found a way to have hope triumph on seven different occasions. While I pride myself on my perseverance, I’m not sure I could have endured that much heartbreak, but I am grateful for my second chance. It’s not that I’m that much better of a husband, just more experienced.

When Debbie and I had our first child together, it was my second daughter that was born on the second of August. That’s right, tomorrow is Heather’s birthday. Right from the start she tested my desire to be a father for a second time. In fact, the second I fell asleep was when she became colicky and started crying. We spent numerous nights in the days before 24 hour television trying to find the one late night station, or tuning the radio to some music she found suitable.

Heather (left) with her sisters outside Tucson
last fall.

At her second birthday party Heather uttered the words that have been immortalized in one of our favorite home movies, “More prezzies, more prezzies.” Even though, she complains about having gone to law school and the huge debt she has as a result, her mother and I are grateful it enabled her to enter a profession where her average annual salary is likely to continue to exceed what her two teacher parents earned. Although she claims to have reigned in her desire for “more prezzies,” she admits to an occasional need for some retail therapy.

Heather (right) with Debbie on Mother's Day
this spring.

No matter what her complaints may be, there are two qualities I am proud to say she shares with me. First, she is generous to a fault, and second she retains and can dispense a huge amount of trivial information, particularly about movies. Last night, as we celebrated her birthday with dinner at the Wolfgang Puck Bistro inside Macy’s at Southcoast Plaza, she said she finally saw the movie, Across the Universe. So, we debated the roles the actor Jim Sturgess has played. Her boyfriend, Jonathan, and Debbie looked on in amazement as we consulted imdb.com when we wanted confirmation.

So, tomorrow, as everyone flips over another day on their calendar I will celebrate the second day of the month as my second chance at marriage and a family, and the anniversary of the birth of my second child. Will anybody second that?